Chapter 13 — Exercises

These exercises are a gym, not a test. The aim of Chapter 13 was to convert a frightening pile of "don'ts" into a small set of systems you can reason from — and to give the heavy political and historical sensitivities the calm, listening posture they deserve. Work these with a pen and a little honesty about your own reflexes (the hand you'd point with, the gift you'd reach for). The discomfort of catching your own instinct is the water becoming visible.

Selected answers and sample responses appear in Appendix: Answers to Selected Exercises. Exercises marked with ✍️ feed directly into your Cultural Intelligence Portfolio.

Part A — Check Your Understanding

Short answers in your own words. If one stumps you, reread the matching section before moving on.

1. State the "head high, feet low" map in one sentence, then name one head taboo and one feet taboo that fall out of it.
2. Why is the left hand treated as "unclean" in South Asia and the Middle East — and name two everyday actions the rule governs. In which region of the East does this rule not apply?
3. What is the safe default gesture for pointing at a person or thing across much of Southeast Asia, and why is the finger-point avoided?
4. Explain why so many Chinese gift taboos (clock, umbrella, shoes, pear) are about words. What single feature of the language drives it?
5. Why is the number four unlucky across China, Japan, and Korea? Name one place you'd physically see this.
6. The chapter says political/historical sensitivities call for a different posture than etiquette taboos. In one sentence, what is that posture — and why?
7. Restate the "Three-Tier Sensitivity Triage" from memory: name the three tiers and the one-word strategy for each.

Part B — Check Your Assumptions

The skill here is catching a Western reflex before it acts. For each statement below, decide whether it is a safe universal or a hidden Western assumption that could cause offense in part of the East. Then write one sentence on the culture/logic that would see it differently.

1. "Affectionately patting a child on the head is a universally warm gesture."
2. "A thumbs-up means 'good job' everywhere."
3. "It doesn't matter which hand I use to pass someone a document."
4. "A clock or a nice watch is a classy, safe gift for anyone."
5. "White is a clean, elegant, neutral color for wrapping a present or for an outfit."
6. "If I have a thoughtful, balanced opinion on a political conflict, sharing it shows I'm engaged and respectful."

The point of this exercise is not that the Western reflex is bad — patting a kid's head is sweet at home, and a watch is a lovely gift in the West. The point is that each one feels obviously fine and is in fact culturally loaded. Noticing the "but that's surely harmless" feeling is the whole skill.

Part C — Decode This

Each item is a real cross-cultural moment. Write (i) what the Western visitor probably assumes is happening, and (ii) the more likely meaning inside the local system. You won't always be certain — practice generating the plausible alternative.

1. You hand your Korean colleague a printed attendance sheet; their name is in red ink because you ran out of black. They go quiet and look briefly unsettled.
2. At a temple in Chiang Mai, you sit cross-legged on the floor to rest, and an attendant quietly gestures for you to shift your legs to the side.
3. You give your new Chinese business partner a beautifully boxed desk clock as a thank-you gift. He accepts it with a fixed smile and sets it aside without comment.
4. You ask an Indonesian colleague for directions; instead of pointing, she juts her lips toward the hallway.
5. Over dinner in Seoul, you cheerfully ask your host what he thinks should happen with North Korea, expecting an interesting chat. The table goes still.

Part D — What Would You Do?

Real situations, each with several responses. There's no single "correct" answer — pick the one closest to your instinct, then write why a culturally intelligent person might choose differently.

1. The pointed feet. You're sitting on the floor at a Thai family's home, legs stretched out to rest after a long day, and you suddenly notice your soles are aimed straight at the elderly grandmother across the room. Do you (a) leave it — you didn't mean anything and pointing it out would be awkward; (b) quietly and smoothly fold your legs back and to the side, no announcement; (c) loudly apologize and explain you "didn't know the rule"; (d) get up and move seats entirely? What does each option signal about face and repair?

2. The left-handed dinner. You're genuinely left-handed, and you're at a traditional hand-eaten meal in Lahore where everyone is using their right hand. Do you (a) just eat with your left as you always do — it's how you're built; (b) struggle through with your right and accept you'll be clumsy; (c) lightly name it — "forgive me, I'm left-handed, I'll do my best" — then try your right; (d) skip eating with your hands and ask for cutlery? Which choices honor the rule, and which one combines honesty and effort?

3. The Palestine question at dinner. You're three meetings into a promising deal in the Gulf. At a relaxed dinner, your host's brother asks, pointedly, what you think about Israel and Palestine. Do you (a) give your honest, carefully balanced opinion to show you're informed; (b) deflect warmly and turn it into a question — "Honestly, I'm here to learn how people who live with this see it; tell me"; (c) say "I never discuss politics" and change the subject flatly; (d) agree with whatever you think he wants to hear? What are the risks of each, and which protects both the relationship and your integrity?

4. The gift you already bought. You're about to give your Chinese host a present and a local friend gently tells you the elegant white-wrapped clock you chose is, between the color and the object, a double funeral omen. The dinner is in an hour. Do you (a) give it anyway — it's the thought that counts and re-buying is a hassle; (b) keep the gift but re-wrap it in red and swap the card; (c) ditch the clock entirely and grab a box of nice fruit or pastries instead; (d) give it but explain you "didn't know"? Which options actually fix the problem, and which just explain it?

Part E — Cultural Translation / Try This

Part 1 — Soften the refusal. Across the East, a flat "no" to offered food or drink can wound the host. For each blunt line, write a warmer version that declines the item without rejecting the person — praising the food or naming your own constraint, and honoring the offer.

1. "No thanks, I'm full."
2. "I don't drink."
3. "I don't eat that."

Part 2 — Defuse and redirect. For each heavy topic that's been dropped on you, write one sentence that gracefully turns your opinion into their experience (i.e., converts a request for your take into a question that invites them to share). Aim for warm, curious, non-evasive.

4. A Chinese colleague asks what you think about Taiwan's status.
5. An Indian and a Pakistani colleague, both present, ask where you "stand" on Kashmir.
6. A Korean host asks whether you think reunification will ever happen.

Part F — Reflection & Extension

1. What the taboo protects. The chapter argues that "what a culture forbids reveals what it holds sacred." Pick three taboos from this chapter and, for each, name the value or belief it's protecting (e.g., the head taboo protects a belief about the spirit/sacredness of the person). Then turn the mirror: name one strong Western taboo (something that genuinely shocks Westerners) and say what it reveals about Western values.
2. The reverse mirror. Find a gesture or habit that's completely normal in your own Western culture but that an Eastern visitor might find rude, unclean, or alarming (consider: eye contact intensity, blowing your nose at the table, shoes indoors, how you beckon a server, physical touch with strangers). Describe it neutrally, as an anthropologist would, with its internal logic — the way this book tries to describe Eastern practices.

✍️ Portfolio Builder. Build the "Taboo & Sensitivity Checklist" for your chosen culture (the Portfolio Prompt from the chapter), organized by the three tiers. For the Political/Historical tier specifically, do one extra thing: write, in your own words, a two-sentence neutral summary of why each sensitive topic is painful for people there — not your opinion on it, just an even-handed statement of why it matters to them. Practicing the neutral summary now means that when the topic surfaces at a real dinner, your instinct will already be "understand and acknowledge," not "opine." This is the page that will save you the most embarrassment in the entire project — and researching it teaches you the culture's deepest commitments.