Chapter 7 — Quiz
Try the whole quiz before checking the key.
Multiple choice
1. "How are you?" said by a passing colleague is: - A) a sincere request for a health update - B) a greeting ritual; reply "good, you?" - C) an invitation to lunch - D) a complaint
2. A good Western handshake is: - A) very soft and long - B) firm, brief, with eye contact and a smile - C) crushing, to show strength - D) avoided entirely
3. Small talk is best understood as: - A) a meaningless waste of time - B) relationship infrastructure — the doorway to real connection - C) only for extroverts - D) the same as gossip
4. Which is a safe small-talk topic? - A) how much someone earns - B) the weather and weekend plans - C) someone's weight - D) religion
5. Which topic should you AVOID with someone you just met? - A) the local sports team - B) travel - C) salary/money - D) the weather
6. "We should hang out sometime!" usually means: - A) a firm scheduled commitment - B) a friendly signal that becomes a plan only with a specific time - C) an insult - D) a job offer
7. The smooth Western response to "I love your jacket!" is: - A) "Oh, this old thing, it's nothing" - B) "Thank you!" - C) "No, it's ugly" - D) silence
8. In France, before almost any interaction (e.g., entering a shop), you should: - A) say nothing - B) say "Bonjour" first — skipping it is rude - C) shake everyone's hand - D) compliment the owner
9. Compared to the US, German small talk is generally: - A) much more extensive - B) less extensive — people get to the point faster - C) identical - D) forbidden
10. The main skill in small talk is: - A) being witty and clever - B) being warm and interested (ask questions, listen) - C) talking about yourself - D) staying silent
11. (new) Calling a stranger's cheerful "how are you?!" fake is a category error because it mistakes: - A) a question for a greeting - B) a ritual of goodwill for a claim of intimacy - C) politeness for rudeness - D) English for another language
12. (new) The safest default physical greeting across the West, when unsure, is: - A) a hug - B) a cheek kiss - C) a firm, brief handshake - D) a bow
True / False
13. Skipping small talk makes you seem "authentic" and is admired in the West. (True / False)
14. A close friend who asks "how are you?" and settles in may genuinely want to know. (True / False)
15. Asking a new acquaintance their age or salary is normal small talk everywhere. (True / False)
16. You can keep deep, sincere conversation for your close relationships while using small talk for acquaintances. (True / False)
17. (new) Physical greetings (handshake/hug/kiss) are basically the same across all Western countries. (True / False)
Short answer
18. Explain why small talk is "infrastructure," not "fakery."
19. A new acquaintance says "We should grab dinner sometime!" How do you turn this signal into a real plan?
20. Give one genuine downside of Western greeting/small-talk rituals (the Honesty Box).
21. (new) What single posture prevents most greeting collisions when moving between Western countries?
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Answer Key
- B. 2. B. 3. B. 4. B. 5. C. 6. B. 7. B. 8. B. 9. B. 10. B. 11. B (ritual goodwill ≠ claimed intimacy). 12. C (firm brief handshake).
- False — it reads as cold and slams the doorway to connection. 14. True. 15. False — normal in some cultures, intrusive in the West. 16. True. 17. False — they vary sharply (handshake vs. la bise vs. hug) by country.
- Model: It's the low-risk way an individualist, low-context culture builds rapport and trust with strangers from scratch — the doorway you must pass through to reach real connection — not empty noise.
- Model: Propose a specific time/place: "I'd love that — are you free next Thursday around 7?" Specifics convert a friendly signal into a plan.
- Model: It can feel hollow, repetitive, or exhausting; surface "fake" friendliness can coexist with real loneliness and shallow connection.
- Model: Let the other person initiate and mirror them, defaulting to a firm handshake when unsure (plus learn each country's few non-negotiables, like France's "Bonjour first").