Chapter 14 — Exercises

The Western workplace rewards engagement and punishes both over-deference and overstepping. These exercises train the balance. Sample answers for closed items follow.

A. What Would You Do?

Scenario 1: The open door

Your manager said "my door is always open." You have a quick question that would help your work. You: - (a) Never go — bothering a senior is disrespectful. - (b) Go by with the quick, well-formed question (using the open door appropriately signals engagement). - (c) Go in to complain at length about a coworker. - (d) Skip your manager and complain to their boss about them.

Scenario 2: Waiting vs. initiative

You finish your assigned task and notice a problem nobody asked you to fix. You: - (a) Wait to be told what to do next. - (b) Flag the problem and propose a solution / take initiative to address it. - (c) Ignore it — not your job. - (d) Do nothing and assume someone else will.

Scenario 3: Reading real power

A decision needs support. The org chart says your manager decides, but you sense a senior colleague really drives these calls. You: - (a) Only talk to your manager (the chart says so). - (b) Treat everyone courteously and make sure the real influencer understands and supports your idea before the meeting. - (c) Loudly challenge the senior colleague in the meeting. - (d) Assume the meeting itself will decide everything.

Scenario 4: The "we're a family" overtime (new)

Your warm startup says "we're a family," and you're asked — again — to work the weekend, unpaid, "for the team." You're exhausted. You: - (a) Do it without question; family helps family. - (b) Be a committed colleague and set a limit: help when truly needed, but protect your time and take your vacation. - (c) Refuse everything and become hostile. - (d) Quietly burn out and resent everyone.

Scenario 5: The decision already made (new)

You present a strong proposal in a meeting and it loses to a weaker one that the room somehow already favored. You: - (a) Conclude colleagues are political and insincere, and stop preparing. - (b) Realize decisions are often shaped before meetings — and start doing the 1-on-1 groundwork next time. - (c) Present even harder slides next time, changing nothing else. - (d) Complain that the system is rigged.

Choose and justify each using "flat but not flat" and "surface equality, private power-literacy." Why is the pre-work (Scenario 5) not cynical politics?

B. Decode This

  1. "My door is always open."
  2. "Take ownership of this."
  3. "Let's touch base next week."
  4. "We're like a family here."
  5. "Let me know if you need anything."
  6. (new) "Can you take a first pass at this?"
  7. (new) "Let's circle back / put a pin in it."

C. Translate Between Cultures

Task 1 — From waiting to initiative. Rewrite each "waiting" behavior into a proactive, Western-workplace version: 1. Finishing a task and sitting idle until told what's next. 2. Noticing a problem but staying silent because no one asked.

Task 2 — Influence a decision. A proposal you support is being decided in Thursday's meeting. List three things you'd do before the meeting to actually shape the outcome.

Task 3 — Warmth with boundaries (new). Write two sentences you could say at a "we're a family" job that are warm and committed yet boundaried (e.g., agreeing to help on a real crunch while declining to be on-call at midnight every night).

D. Culture-Shock Journal

  1. How flat, really? Describe your workplace's real power structure beneath the org chart and the friendly surface.
  2. Your trap. Are you more at risk of over-deferring (waiting, staying quiet) or overstepping (too blunt, ignoring hierarchy)? Why?
  3. "Family" check. Has your workplace used "we're a family" language? How did it feel — warm, or a pressure?
  4. The pre-meeting (new). Recall a decision that didn't go your way. With hindsight, where was it actually decided, and what groundwork could have changed it?

E. Ask a Local

Ask a trusted Western colleague: - "How are decisions really made here — in meetings, or beforehand?" - "What does 'taking initiative' look like that managers here actually reward?" - (new) "Who do people here actually go to when they want something to happen?"

Record the answer.

F. Self-Assessment

Rate 1–5: 1. I use the open door appropriately (engaged, but respecting the chain of command). 2. I show initiative and take ownership without being chased. 3. I read the real power structure, not just the org chart. 4. I match the dress code to my level/industry. 5. I keep healthy boundaries despite "we're a family" rhetoric.

Note date and scores. (Appendix J collects the book's self-assessments.)

Sample Answers & Discussion

A: 1 → (b) — use the open door for quick questions (engagement); (a) over-defers, (c) misuses it, (d) skips the chain of command (backfires). 2 → (b) — initiative is expected and rewarded; waiting (a/d) reads as passivity. 3 → (b) — treat all courteously (surface equality) while securing the real influencer's support beforehand (private power-literacy); (a) ignores hidden power, (c) overspeaks publicly, (d) misreads how decisions are made. 4 → (b) — warmth with boundaries; "family" rhetoric doesn't change that it's a business that can lay you off. 5 → (b) — decisions form before meetings; do the groundwork (not cynical — it's how influence legitimately works here).

B — Decode This: 1 = come with quick questions/ideas, respecting the chain of command. 2 = you're now responsible for driving this to completion proactively. 3 = let's check in / talk briefly next week. 4 = often warm, but be cautious — can be used to extract loyalty/overwork; it's still a company. 5 = a support offer, but try first and ask specifically. 6 = "draft a first version" — they expect you to start, not wait for full instructions. 7 = "let's revisit this later" (sometimes a soft "not now").

C — Task 1: 1 → "I've finished X; I'll start on Y and flag anything that needs your input" (or proactively ask "what's the next priority?"). 2 → "I noticed [problem]; here's a possible fix — want me to take it on?" Task 2 model: talk to the real decision-influencers 1-on-1; share your view and evidence in advance; line up a colleague's support; address likely objections before the meeting so the room is already aligned. Task 3 model: "I'm glad to pitch in for the launch crunch this week." / "I do need to protect my evenings to stay sharp, so I'll be offline after 7 most nights — I'll flag if that ever needs to flex."

D, E, F are personal — your honest reflection is the answer.